Brief Summary
In this video, Felicia Putri Tjiasaka and Anisa Steviani discuss financial preparations before marriage, drawing from Anisa's 10 years of marriage experience. They emphasize the importance of open communication about finances, assessing a partner's work ethic and debt management, and understanding their family's financial background. The discussion highlights that financial stability and shared values are crucial for a successful marriage, more so than just being in love or feeling ready due to societal expectations.
- Open communication about finances is key.
- Assess a partner's work ethic and debt management.
- Understand their family's financial background.
- Financial stability and shared values are crucial for a successful marriage.
Introduction
Felicia Putri Tjiasaka introduces Anisa Steviani, a certified financial planner with 10 years of marriage experience, to discuss financial preparations before marriage based on audience requests. Anisa shares that she married at 25 and has an 8.5-year-old child, noting that attitudes toward marriage and family planning have evolved since then.
Family's Perspective on Finances
Anisa recounts how her family openly discussed finances, even during her teenage years, with her mother involving her in understanding the family's cash flow and expenses. When Anisa brought boyfriends home, her parents would inquire about their employment status, job security, and salary. This approach, while unconventional to some, normalized financial discussions within her family.
Requirements for a Potential Spouse
Anisa reveals that her family didn't have strict requirements for a potential spouse regarding assets like owning a house. However, having a stable job was essential due to concerns about financial security. Anisa emphasizes that her family would not approve of a husband earning less than her. More importantly, she looked for someone hardworking and dedicated, valuing a strong work ethic over current financial status, believing success would follow.
Key Questions Before Marriage
Anisa highlights the importance of asking key questions about finances before getting married. These include discussing the use of credit cards and debt, as well as understanding the financial habits and potential influences of the partner's family. She expresses concern about taking on excessive debt for lifestyle purposes or dealing with family members who encourage debt accumulation.
Evaluating Family Background
Anisa stresses the significance of understanding a partner's family background, particularly their financial habits and potential impact on the marriage. She shares concerns about families that encourage debt or have poor financial management, which could strain the couple's finances. Setting boundaries and being able to say no to unreasonable financial requests from family members is crucial.
Three Financial Preparations Before Marriage
Anisa summarizes three essential financial preparations before marriage: assessing the partner's work ethic (more about the willingness to work than the current income), understanding their approach to debt, and evaluating their family's financial background. She acknowledges that the latter two can be challenging to assess but are critical for long-term financial stability.
Dealing with Deficiencies
Anisa suggests that marriage involves lifelong tolerance, and it's essential to consider whether you can accept certain financial behaviors or attitudes in your partner. She contrasts her approach to marriage with those who marry solely based on being proposed to, without considering financial compatibility or future goals.
Potential Problems and Scenarios
Anisa describes potential problems that may arise if financial compatibility is not considered, such as a partner lacking ambition or accumulating hidden debt. She also discusses the challenges of dealing with demanding or financially irresponsible family members.
Advice and Regrets
Anisa advises against rushing into marriage and emphasizes the importance of having a growth mindset in both partners. She shares that financial difficulties can significantly impact mental health. She suggests addressing underlying emotional or psychological issues that may contribute to poor financial decisions, possibly through therapy or financial planning.
Conclusion
Felicia concludes by thanking Anisa for sharing her experiences and insights on financial preparations before marriage. She encourages viewers to suggest other topics for future discussions.
