Brief Summary
This video explores the phenomenon of copying identities and aesthetics, particularly the "it girl" trend, and discusses why people are drawn to certain cohesive identities. It examines the human desire for self-definition and the influence of social media in shaping identity, while also cautioning against over-reliance on external references. The video suggests that a more authentic identity emerges from living life and drawing from diverse experiences rather than strictly adhering to curated aesthetics.
- The desire for a cohesive and understandable identity drives people to emulate others.
- Social media amplifies the tendency to copy, leading to a homogenization of aesthetics.
- Authentic identity emerges from diverse experiences and internal development, not strict adherence to trends.
Carolyn Bassette Kenedy
The video starts by highlighting the trend of people wanting to achieve the "it girl" aesthetic, exemplified by the renewed interest in Carolyn Bessette Kennedy. Despite her private nature, Carolyn is now seen as an icon of the clean girl, old money aesthetic, with tutorials and articles dissecting her style. While her minimalist and accessible style is appealing, it was her effortless and authentic persona that truly captivated people. In today's culture, where curated online personas dominate, many struggle to define their own identities, leading them to seek inspiration from social media and celebrities, often resulting in a homogenization of styles and references.
The "It Girl" Phenomenon
The video explores the concept of a cohesive identity, where a person's appearance, behavior, and interests align seamlessly, using Zoe Kravitz as an example. People are drawn to this coherence, especially in an era where many feel lost in defining themselves. The speaker notes the rise of curation as a sought-after skill, where identity is constructed and presented publicly through social media, apartments, and routines. This emphasis on curation can lead individuals to edit out complex parts of themselves to maintain a consistent image, sometimes sacrificing authenticity. The desire to be both unique and curated results in people using the same references, contributing to a lack of originality.
Why Do We Copy?
The video addresses why people tend to reference the same individuals and aesthetics, explaining that humans have always looked to others to determine what is desirable. Drawing on Thorstein Veblen's concept of pecuniary emulation, the video explains the tendency to imitate the consumption patterns of those perceived as higher in the social hierarchy for status and belonging. Social learning theory from Albert Bandura suggests that people are more likely to imitate those they see as successful, attractive, or high status. Social media amplifies this tendency by showcasing lifestyles and behaviors, leading people to copy even unintentional actions of influential figures. People are not just copying the item or behavior but also the lifestyle and persona associated with it.
The Human Desire
The video explores the underlying human desire to define oneself and be understood by others. The feeling of not knowing who you are is common, and a clearly defined identity provides stability. In a world where people are constantly aware of how they are perceived, there is a pressure to curate a perfect and presentable image. This desire to define oneself makes people susceptible to copying the latest "it girl" for answers, but relying on social media for references flattens identity. Identity is fluid and always evolving, while social media tends to put people in restrictive boxes. The speaker argues that the desire for a defined identity is exploited to sell products, as people are led to believe that identity can be bought.
Customizing Your Avatar
The speaker shares personal experiences with customizing their own style and identity, emphasizing a love for fashion and design. The process involves trial and error, using Pinterest and Instagram for inspiration, and archiving inspiring images. Identity curation involves choosing which parts of oneself to show to the world, similar to curating a social media feed or bedroom. The speaker seeks inspiration from people who resemble them or share similar interests, building in a way that aligns with their existing self. Trends are approached cautiously, and the speaker's style is a mix of various influences accumulated over time. The speaker realized that starting with an aesthetic and hoping the identity would follow was ineffective, and now approaches identity more slowly and organically.
Can You Be Inspiration
The video returns to the question of what happens to identity when everyone builds it using the same references. Over time, these references become overused and separated from their original context, losing their appeal. While some people organically develop their identities by drawing from diverse experiences, interests, and influences, the identities that remain compelling over time are those that emerged naturally from living a certain kind of life. The speaker suggests that the most compelling version of your identity is not intentionally built but naturally forms as you live your life. The goal is not to stop being inspired but to be more aware of where references come from and how much space they are given to define oneself.
