so some stuff happened

0:14 Berry buff heart. Berry bug hard. Berry bug. Bro. Buzz robot bud robot mud robot together

1:15 the berry bud. Very bug robot. Very bug head. Very bug robot. Very bug head. Very bugart. Very bug head. Very bug robot. Very bug head. Very bug robot. Very bug head. Bart. Very [ __ ] Very bugart. Very bug head. Very bugart. Very bug head.

2:13 Very bug head. I'm done. I'm so proud of you.

3:05 Heat. Bearing is a pretty cool bug, even when she wears her headset wrong.

3:52 Heat. Heat.

4:45 Oh. Oh [ __ ] I forgot to change the stinger. I'm so sorry. I'm I'm so sorry. Whoopsie. Oh, wait. Let me do that again. One second. >> Berry bug brohart. Barry bug brohart. >> Okay. Sorry. I'm I'm a little nervous. Yeah, you got a free punch. Um Yeah. Hi. Hi. Hi, everybody. >> Uh, wait. I'm I'm going to um I'm going to mute everything. So, yeah, cuz I want to make this

5:31 a more serious a more serious stream. Um, sorry. I'm like immediately a mess. Wow. Sorry. Sorry. Um, but yeah. Uh, wait, let me get some let me get some BGM real quick. Sorry. Uh, okay. I think this should be good. Hi Tori. I hope you're doing well. Um, so you guys,

6:17 sorry. I'm I'm not good with uh this this stuff at all, but Oh [ __ ] this might have been not so good of an idea. Um, but you guys might have seen an update to my Twitter and Blue Sky where I talked about um I talked about how I was uh slated to join Bishojo as a future generation, as

7:04 a future talent. Um, uh, I was signed in the beginning of this year. And these are from, for people wondering, these are from the auditions. Um, sorry. Oh god. Sorry. I don't mean to be so shaky right off the bat, but yeah, these are from the auditions from last year. I I think they were right. Yeah, if my memory isn't bad. But yeah, my these these are from the auditions. Uh but so I I passed them and I got signed

7:50 in January and um after everything that came out, I decided to void my contract and um basically ask for, you know, to not be part of the company anymore. Um, and as of today, I am no longer part of the company. Um, and I'm really I'm really sad about the opportunities that I've passed up or that I will be missing. But at the same time,

8:36 my experiences are only uh it's only a drop in the bucket. And it really hurts hearing about every other person's experience and how people have been people have been going through so much horrors and I'm really sorry. I'm sorry. Oh god. Maybe this was a bad idea. Yeah. So, I I really hope like honestly I I just wanted to go live to try and

9:24 um clear things up because I know I kind of especially near the beginning of the year. I was talking a lot to my community about stuff I had planned without ever going into details. And I know recently I've been cancelling streams and not streaming or talking about how I've been crying without going into details. And I just wanted to clear things up for you guys. Um, so I I genuinely don't want people to think that I'm like bandwagoning. Um because I really think the people who deserve support are the people who um

10:10 are genuinely like in a very bad spot because of this. Uh luckily I I think I'll be mostly fine. Uh uh luckily I I'll be mostly fine. So you guys don't need to worry about me at all. Um I I wrote down some notes, but um yeah. Uh sorry. Um yeah. Uh this is like honestly I don't expect anything out of my stream. Um this is mostly just to update you guys on what I'm thinking and what I'm doing or planning on doing. Um, this is probably

10:56 going to be like a nothing sandwich, honestly. But I hope you guys are ready to [ __ ] gobble it up. Open up, [ __ ] Um, but yeah, I I only want to talk about myself as well. Um, I'm not going to talk about the other girls, but and I'm not going to talk about um the girls who haven't come forward or anything like that. Um, for now the only people I can confirm were in my group were um I mean we all kind of said it on Twitter, but it was me, Pia, and Tori. Um, and I hope you guys can give Tori and Pia support as well

11:45 because I I'm pretty sure um they they spent some money on their debuts thinking they'd be uh you know we we'd have the debut budget. Sorry, I'm I'm like shaking. Um but yeah, um so I I'll be fine. Luckily, I I haven't spent anything. Um it was mostly just me um in limbo and uh so I I'll be fine. Um it it was yeah luckily I all the stuff I had I was just thinking about and window shopping mostly. So, um yeah, but

12:31 um yeah, mostly what's um I kind of just felt stupid the entire time. Um because I I never told anyone this either, but I actually did um audition for V Showjo the very first time they they released auditions. And I also um I I passed the first round, but it it kind of fell apart and um they you know, you probably heard this, but they gave like uh some money to everyone who kind of passed and they

13:17 kind of let on and I was happy about at least getting some money because you know you know they didn't they didn't have to do that and I'm really grateful that that we got money at least. But um throughout this I've just kind of been thinking that I've kind of felt for it again. Um, everyone though I I I want to say I

14:03 it's I don't think um I everyone I met at V Showjo or at least the people I was able to talk to were really kind and really nice and I could tell that they were doing their best with a bad situation. And um I wasn't able to talk to any of the existing Vishojo talent, but I really really genuinely hope everything works out for them. And that I really don't want I'm I'm sure me and

14:49 the other girls all agree that I that we don't want us not debuting or being um you know put into some sticky situations are like not their responsibility and we we don't want them to to take responsibility for that. um you know uh um yeah I don't know I I'm hearing about some of the other girls and what they went through. I think generally speaking I'm like um in like a better position

15:36 than some other people and I'm really grateful but at the same time I I I feel I feel bad cuz I don't know why I'm even making this dream then. But I'm sorry I just I had to um get some stuff out of my chest at least a little bit. Um, but I really really do hope that everything works out for them. You know, again, I'm just like a drop in the bucket and you know, there's like so many other things that are like deserve way way more spot um time in the spotlight. Um, yeah. So, um, thank you to everyone on

16:21 Twitter and, um, Blue Sky and Discord and everything who have been sending nice messages. I'm sorry that I I can't I didn't respond to all of them or I just liked your tweet um because I genuinely um I I've been up since like 6:00 a.m. or maybe even 4:00 a.m. Um and it's been stressing me out a lot. So, I think I I won't be able to be on Twitter unless it's for like unless it's for like Yahi or like Uma posts. Um uh uh

17:07 and yeah um but yeah I will say I can't say anything about the company most mostly because um I don't really know anything about the company. It's mostly just stuff I've heard like you guys uh or through the vape grape vine. Um but yeah, I I couldn't believe it until it was all confirmed. Um yeah, it I I I couldn't believe it. So, yeah, I've been crying a lot recently, and I'm

17:54 really sorry to all my bug bros for cancelling streams or not being able to stream as often as I would have, especially when my anniversary was last week and I didn't really have anything planned because I thought a lot more things would be happening and I thought I would have a lot more. I thought I would be able to do bring a lot of my plans into fruition. I know I talked about my Metal Gear Berry inspired outfit a lot in the beginning of the year and while I did have plans moving last year for that, um, I cancelled them, but I'll I'll be moving forward with

18:40 on my own terms with a lot of them. Okay. Yeah. Um, sorry. And uh, yeah, I also unfortunately passed up a lot of opportunities um because I thought I'd be joining. And so I'm sorry to anyone who reached out and offered me offered me uh like partnerships and stuff and to where and I said no. Um I hope you don't mind if I come crawling back to you in a way.

19:27 Um but every Yeah, sorry. I'm also like very scattered minded, scatterbrained right now, so I might be repeating stuff. Um, and this is the first time um I'm doing something like this cuz I really don't like um drama or putting myself in like these positions. So, I'm very nervous and you could probably tell that I'm not used to this at all. Um, but yeah, I was really excited, especially because I really looked up to a lot of YouTubers and be showjo

20:15 and I was really excited to be a bug girl and the concept that they had told us and everything like that made me really excited for the future. But but yeah, I I think after talking to friends and stuff, um I was really close to just graduating. To be honest, I thought maybe it was time for me to call it quits and actually, you know, get a real job and actually start

21:01 and actually start taking things more seriously, especially because I wanted to join a company to have more structure and to get more to become more financially stable. And I really wanted as when I got when I signed into V Showjo, I told my parents first thing and I wanted to and I told my dad that I could I would make him retire. So yeah, it's been kind of hard cuz I think I got a kind of a big head once I got signed and I thought everything would be okay. Um,

21:47 so yeah, I've been But it's okay. I I I thought I got a lot of my tears out um like last week, but apparently that's not true. Um, yeah, I've just been kind of crying and waiting for my parents to leave the house so I could cry without them hearing me. But yeah, sorry. I'm going to cough real quick. Um, it's been pretty rough mentally as well. Um, you know, some bug bros may

22:35 know I recently talked to my psychiatrist about lowering lowering my dosage on my anti-depressants. So, it was very very weird timing to to do that. Oh, don't worry. Nothing. I didn't do anything drastic, but I was definitely going through the horrors a little bit, and I definitely have some um bald spots on my pretty little head. Um um yeah. Um I I was pretty bad. I was pretty in I was in a bad mental state,

23:21 but I talked to my friends and they helped calm me down. Um yeah, this is uh um yeah, but uh it's okay. I mostly I was just I just wanted, you know, silly things. I was like, "Oh, I'm going to get a I'm going to get a modeled by an FJO artist." And so that was like kind of the thing I was most looking forward to. But maybe maybe another day. Maybe we'll we'll get we'll get uh that another day.

24:08 Um but yeah, I really appreciate everyone being really supportive. Um, and uh, yeah, everyone is super supportive and everybody that I talked to at V Showjo was super nice. At least the people that I talked to, of course, like I I wasn't really in the know about a lot of stuff and like obviously cuz I wasn't even debuted yet. Um, and I it was kind of limited contact, but everyone I did meet I'm really grateful for and I hope that we can work together maybe sometime.

24:53 Hold on. What was their price? I have $30. You and me both. Let's go. No, just kidding. I I have money. Don't worry, guys. Don't don't don't um you you guys should use any funds that you want to donate to any any or at least me. I I can't talk about the other girls because I know the other girls might be might have spent some money, but you should spend it on the the tillifi. Um yeah, but um I I think mostly that's everything I wanted to say. I of course I I I

25:40 think I'm like the person who has like the least say about the entire situation. Um, but yeah, so I I'll be working on new model debuts and get back to working on um uh MG, my Metal Gear outfit and things of that nature. And I really appreciate everyone. Thank you. Sorry for being such a crybaby. A crybar. Yeah. Um, honestly,

26:25 I I I did want to stream or get back to streaming regularly this week. Um, I do want to stream tomorrow, but we'll we'll see how it goes. Um I I do I do want to get back into the regular swing of things. Um yeah. Yeah. Um if you know that that's never be sorry. Yeah. I I I still still And also wait hold on. Um, I also wrote down this because this is important to say for me. Um, to all

27:12 my bug bros and to all my friends, thank you for supporting me and I hope you'll continue to support me. And to any companies who may I who may or may not see this, I hope you'll forgive me for being more emotional and maybe even a little unprofessional in this stream. and I hope that um everything will stabilize soon and stuff like that. Um yeah, I at first I wasn't really sure um if I even wanted to say anything at all. Um but I I just thought maybe maybe maybe I should say at least something

27:59 and stuff like that. I didn't actually write at stuff like that. Uh yeah. Uh I think um I don't know if Tori is going to make a statement later. I I don't know if she's going to go live later today, but I know Pia's going to go live in I think it was sometime um at like 9:00 p.m. EST. Um I I think uh Tori and Pia and the other the girl other girls who are waiting with us were very talented and I'm really I'm really sad that we

28:47 weren't able to debut together, but I hope that I hope that they still hold on to their dreams and that things work out. Yeah. But yeah, um yeah, we'll we'll turn this into something good. And I also I just want to really really reiterate like to to the people I met at V Showjo, thank you for working so hard even even though you were dealt bad hands. Um and thank you for doing your best and I

29:33 hope that everyone who unfortunately wasn't able to or is leaving the company which I I guess is like I don't know. I hope uh I hope you guys can get stable jobs or have stable jobs. Yeah, everyone. Yeah, every everyone. Wow, what a what a life we live. Um yeah. No, I I I I think everyone did leave. Um, [ __ ] my chongus ass life, man.

30:22 Yeah, the times are so interesting. I I didn't think that um well, when I heard how bad things were um without confirmation, I kind of knew that things would get out, but I didn't think I would be waking up to I didn't think I was I would be waking up to stuff so suddenly. Um so yeah, sorry if this is this is like obviously it it's it's very unplanned. Um, I hope my statement was sufficient and I hope this video isn't too embarrassing. I don't know. Who knows? Maybe maybe I'll like delete the video afterwards and be like, "Ah, it's too embarrassing. I I cried the entire time. It was ah, it's you can't watch. You can't

31:08 I'm I'm like a strong bug. You can't think of me like this." Um, yeah. But I um I really do appreciate Vishojo for at least giving me a chance. Um and I was really humbled and really honored to be even considered um an applicant. Oh, wait. Hold on. My mom. Okay, it's okay. Yeah. Um

31:54 uh yeah, we'll see. I I'll continue doing my best. I at least don't have any plans to graduate anymore. Uh I was I was a little I got too silly. I got too silly, man. Um, and yeah, so 1,000 years of bug. Yeah. Yeah. I got held back by I I'm the graduating class of 2030 now. 20 2050 even. Guys, I don't think I'm passing this class. 1,000 years.

32:42 H season two. Yeah. But I I honestly don't have much else to say. Um, I think uh if you guys have any questions, I guess I I I'll answer if I can, but I really don't want to break my NDA. And I also don't want to um like put what is it called? I don't want to point fingers at anyone. I think a lot of people essentially got screwed um to put it in a very blunt way. And I think yeah, [ __ ] happens. Yeah, maybe maybe actually maybe an open forum isn't good. You're

33:29 right, Ocean Bones. You're right. I mean, we'll we'll see how um everything unravels, but for now, that's Yeah, everybody take your meds and make sure to drink water. Um, if not for yourself, then for me. Um, but that that was everything I wanted to say and that's a weight off of my chest. Um, and I hope that I will be all right. You're right. Will I be all right? I will be all right. Um, yeah. Um, but can you tell us about yourself? Yeah, I'm I'm very and I'm a bug and

34:15 usually I um I usually I'm much more energetic and a lot happier, but hopefully you guys can stick around. Um, or if you don't want to stick around, that's totally fine as well. This is very a this is a very awkward meeting. Either way, I really appreciate it. If you're watching this now or later or in a clip or something, thank you. Thank you so much for even viewing a second of me. Um, and I hope that at the very least, uh, everything works out. Um, oh yeah, you're right. Wait, I should advertise my my friend account.

35:02 on Uma Musu. You guys, you guys should give me Oh my god. Uma Musu has been my [ __ ] rock in these trying times. I've been playing non-stop because I've been so like I I could not do anything else but think and try to distract myself. I do not have Kitasan Black, but if you go on my Twitter, I I don't have my ninestar Rudolph anymore, but I have a ninestar El Condor Pasa. So, if you want nine star speed and I think it's might be eight or nine star long, uh, please add me. Ela, yeah, play Google Babies with me.

35:51 Yeah, I got two nine star speeds. Two of them. I got it literally um as I was uh watching some live streams earlier and I was like, "Wow, have you spent money?" Yeah, I spent money only to Google Babies and not to to Sunlack. Um but yeah, um stop flexing, little bro. We'll continue playing I I do want to at least go back to streaming this week. We'll continue playing Dark Souls 1. I'll finally finish Vampire the Masquerade. We'll probably play some Enter the Dungeon because I that's my comfort game.

36:37 Um uh yeah. Um I don't know what else. I I just We'll see what we'll see what goes. We'll play it by ear probably. Will you replay Metal Gear? I do want to replay Metal Gear. I I did want to try and get the Metal Gear Berry going before Delta came out, but um unfortunately I mean I it's not like I have a PS5 or PC strong enough to run Delta. So, I think I will be um putting that on hold so that I can Yeah. What's your favorite Gungeon character slashgun? I do love um oh my god her name is escaping me but I love the girl with the corgi but I recently not

37:24 recently I guess I guess it was in the beginning of the year but I unlocked gunslinger after like 25 parts of enter the dungeon. Hell yeah. Give me your friend points. Huntress. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I we still need to beat the rat um in Gunslinger. Yeah, Gungeon is so good. If there's anything you should take away from this stream, it's that you should buy Enter the Gungeon. No, it's that you should support all the girls. But you should also play Enter the Dungeon.

38:13 You want to play one of the best rogue likes ever. So bad. So [ __ ] bad. I do want to play the new Enter the Dungeon. Also, thank you. Thank you guys for all the gifted subs and stuff. Um, I really do appreciate it. Uh uh. Sorry I wasn't calling them all out, but I really do appreciate it. Maybe maybe next stream I'll call them out all out cuz it it I don't really think it's uh it feel it doesn't feel good calling out subs and stuff like that on a stream that's supposed to be kind of serious. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I hope you'll forgive me. Um but yeah. Um be sure to check out Pia and send her support and on her stream. I don't know.

38:59 Can I raid her? No, I can't raid on Twitch, but maybe I can raid on YouTube to her raid waiting room. I don't know if you guys would even want that. It's like a a year. It's like uh 2 hours away, I think. Um I guess I could, right? Still, I think it's fine. Oh, it's in 4 hours. Um yikes. Um, all right. Well, you guys can check that out on on your own time. That might be a little that that might be a little hard. Um, I'm not going to stream Bloons for 4 hours. You [ __ ]

39:45 mods. Get that guy out of there and put him in the bronze bowl. Oh my god. Oh my goodness gracious. Do your dailies. No. No, man. No. Get out of here. Get out of here. Freaking flicks you guys on the forehead. Get out of here. Yeah. Thank you guys. also but also and this goes out to um this this goes out to maybe the talent I don't know if any of the talents are going to be watching this but also I don't I I I really don't want anyone especially if you're

40:30 watching or if you're related to Vishojo at all to to feel obligated to support like me or or I I I can't speak on the other girl but I think they would I think they would agree. I don't think I I don't want you guys to feel obligated to support us or um you know you like or take us under your wing or donate to us or you know make sure we're okay that we'll be fine. Um you know we'll be fine. Um, and uh, yeah, but I'm just saying don't feel pressured to do that cuz I I don't want the last thing I want is people um

41:16 people, you know, viewing us in that light or getting stressed out because they feel obliged. Um, but yeah, that's all from me to be honest. Uh yeah, I have to check my Twitter and reply to a lot of people still. Um but yeah, I'll be working on my own stuff. Um me to be announced soon. Bug things coming as they say. Um and I hope that you guys at least have a good rest of the day. Yeah. have have a good Do you have a blue sky? I do. I do. I think it should Everything

42:03 should be linked below. Um yeah. Um I I I can raid into somebody, but um if I if I raid into someone, you guys have to pinky promise not to say anything about what we discussed. Don't bring in any of this into other people's streams. If you don't, if you break this promise, I will stick a million needles in your eye and a million needles in the inner part of your knee and I will I will kick you. I will kick you.

42:52 Yeah. Ouch. Um I I don't know if any of um any anyone is online. Uh I know you guys said Oh, wait. Maybe I should have gone online first, you guys. I'm not too sure what to do now. Um yikes. Not Giga is live. Okay. Not Giga is live. Not Giga. We can read into Oh [ __ ] I really Oh, wait. But she's playing GTA. Okay. But okay. Okay. No. No immersion breaks. No immersion breaks. Okay. Lock

43:39 in. Pretend you're part of the mafia. Okay. Pretend you're part of the mafia or um whatever they do. Whatever Whatever Giga's uh um whatever Giga's character is doing right now. Kidnapping. I don't know. Hey, I'm walking here. I'm walking here. Hey. Hey, I'm walking here. I'm I'm I'm right in here. Okay. Bye. Okay. Please. Very It says It says it so very nicely. Please get out. Bye everybody. Bye. We'll be back to our regularly scheduled programming maybe um uh tomorrow. Hopefully. Maybe. I don't

44:26 know. Uh we'll see. Um bye. Get out. Get out. I don't want to see you. Bye-bye. Take care. Take care, everybody. Um yeah. Take care. Take care. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. I'm sorry for being such a mess, but I hope you'll forgive me. Bye-bye. Hopefully we can meet again. To any new people, hopefully we'll meet again um um in better circumstances. And to all the old bug bros, uh you're [ __ ] old. You're old. You're old. And to all my friends who showed up, thank you for showing up in chat. I really appreciate it. Uh why don't you kill over and die, old

45:11 man? Come on, man. Make way. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Oh, wait. Here, I can do this. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Hey, that's a lot of hands. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Bye.