Full transcript of “How to Get Over Him 💔 Advice from a Girl Who’s Been There”. Click a timestamp to open the video at that moment. Need another video? Use the YouTube transcript generator.
0:00 Hey guys, welcome back to my channel. Today I wanted to do a different type of video which I don't usually do on my vlog channel and that is a little mini podcast sesh with you guys. I am super excited because I wanted to talk on a topic that's been on my mind recently and for the past couple months actually. This topic is so relatable to so many people because people get dumped, heartbroken, and leave relationships every single day. And it's so common among teenagers, high schoolers, and among all my friends, you know. So, if you ever got your heart broken or you went through heartache, this video is for you. Today, we're going to talk about how to get over them. And this
0:48 advice is coming from the emotional attachment damage girly that got her heart broken so many times to pieces, literally to dust. I'm a very emotional person and I really love deeply if I love anybody. And I get emotionally attached very deeply to people if I spend time with them. I know exactly what it feels like to get your heart broken. And this person might have meant everything to you. And I totally get that. and now you're wondering, "What do I do next? How do I forget them? How do I move on with my life because they seem to have moved on and I'm just still stuck?" This video is for you if you've ever felt that way or are currently feeling that way. This is how to get over heartbreak, how to detach from someone you were emotionally attached
1:33 to. Um, how to get over him, the guide. And guys, just a disclaimer, these are basically lessons that I learned on my own experience, just some advice I have uh for you. um things here and there, things I did that helped me get over them. And I really hope you guys enjoy this video and relate to it. And if you do relate to this video, then comment down below. Yeah, I would love to know. Okay, so let's get into the video. I've been there. I know what it feels like to be so infatuated by someone, so in love that you just can't imagine your world without them. And when the world crashes, you just don't know what to do, and you feel like the world is ending. I've been there. I know how it feels. And it it's painful like hell. Guy or
2:20 girl, doesn't matter. If you get emotionally attached to someone, it's it's really hard um to get over them and it might feel like they already moved on and you're still stuck, but that's totally not true. You know, you don't know how they're feeling or what they're thinking and they might just be thinking 24/7 about you actually, but they just don't show it and you don't know and you feel like you're the only one. Um, so there's nothing to be ashamed about and you should feel your feelings through. If you're feeling upset, mistreated, you should let those feelings flow. If you feel anger towards them because of what they did, I just wanted to remind you that your feelings are totally valid and you have every right to express them in healthy ways, like journaling, you know, writing songs. That's what I do. I write
3:06 songs about my feelings. I actually have a song uh called Advice coming out August 15th, which is just in a couple of days. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. But if you guys are interested in this topic that I'm about to share with you guys, then I think you'll love my song as well. So, make sure to go listen to that once it's out on Spotify, YouTube, all streaming platforms. I'm super excited to share it with you guys. But today, today we're talking how to get over them. The guide from the professional, like I said, heartbroken person. If you're a very emotional person just like me, then you will relate to this. This will resonate with you. And if you've ever gotten your heartbroken, then this
3:52 video is for you. If you've ever experienced heartache, then this video is for you. If you don't know what to do and the guy left you, then this video is for you. Okay, let's get into the steps on how you can get over them, how you can change your mindset, and how you can transform your mind and your mental state into something more sane. Because when I was going through heartbreak, I was going insane. Trust me on that one. Number one, you have to understand your value. Okay? If he left, that's his problem. You can't make people stay. He didn't leave because you weren't enough. He left because he wasn't capable of loving someone who was. And you really got to
4:40 understand that the problem is not you. And sometimes it might feel like that. It might feel like you are not enough, like you're the problem. Um what's wrong with you? You know, that's how I felt. Um but that's totally not true. All those feelings are just lies. that the situation puts on you and you don't have to believe them. You have to understand your feelings are not you and you can work with them. You can get over them if you try hard enough. You don't need anybody else. No relationship, no guy, no dating to define who you are. You are enough on your own. And even if you didn't have any like guy, kindred spirit, soulmate, partner, boyfriend, if you didn't have anyone, you should be able to be enough for yourself to live a
5:27 whole life without needing anybody. And the true power comes when you actually realize that when I realized that I I don't have to be with anybody, you know, that I don't have to like be with someone just for the sake of being with someone, you know, that the best is yet to come. That's when I realized that that the best will find me. And if he did leave, then that wasn't the best girl. That's just that just wasn't. Another thing I remember myself when I was going through heartache, I remember thinking that what if this is the best that will ever happen to me. What if this guy um is the only one that will like me so much? And all of these thoughts whirling my head and you can really get stuck in that loop pattern
6:13 and just not think sly, you know. But you have to disregard those feelings as well because the mindset that saved me is the best is yet to come. My best days are still yet to come. My best boyfriend is still yet to come. My best life is yet to come. And I'm living it right now. And it's just stretching out ahead of me, you know, and it will come my way. The best will never ever leave you. Like your person, your relationship, your perfect boyfriend, your perfect partner, the guy that's meant for you, he will never ever not be in your life. Because if he's meant to be, then he will be in your life. And if it's not meant to be, then that's okay. Not every person you meet or date is gonna be the
6:59 one. And that's okay. So many times I've seen girls get so obsessed over this random dude at their school. And I'm like thinking, why do you think that your soulmate, like the person God designed you to be with, your perfect ideal guy? Like why is he in your school? You know, like there's 7 billion people in the world. You can find literally the best, the most handsome, the most talented. You don't have to lower your standards just because somebody asked you out, just because somebody started liking you, just because somebody was um saying all these nice things to you and giving you attention. No girl, you have to be very selective of who you allow into your life. And that way you can minimize like heartaches and heartbreaks and all that. But if it happens, then it happens, you know. And I truly believe that
7:47 everything that happens is meant to be. It was meant to happen one way or another to teach you a lesson. And another thing I learned is if you don't learn the lesson that God is literally putting right in front of your nose, he will give you more and more and more situations with the same problems, the same type of people, the same situations just so you finally learn your lesson. And if you don't learn your lesson, then you'll keep getting thrown in these types of situations. So, I truly believe that it's really, really important to take time for yourself, to take time to acknowledge the mistakes that were made in the relationship because it goes both ways. If you're saying that it was all his fault, then it's probably not true
8:34 because technically there are two people in a relationship. And I know this is hard to hear and I've thought about this so much myself. You know, so many times I would turn on the victim mindset, you know, be like, "Oh, this happened to me. I'm so so so sad. I'm such a sad girl." And like, "Why did he do this? Why did he leave me? Why was he so cruel?" Blah, blah, blah. You know, on and on and on. But the truth is, he wouldn't have been able to do the things he did if you wouldn't have let him. You have the power, girl. You have power over everything in your life. The people you surround yourself with, the things you do, the things people get to do to you. Like you have power and control over that. Um, and I really love this saying,
9:21 like if it's one broken heart, like you're a broken heart and he's not brokenhearted. There were four bloody hands, yours and his. It never goes one way. and really acknowledging that is so humbling because that's how you learn from your mistakes. And I don't agree with jumping from relationship to relationship, from guy to girl, but because if you didn't take the time to reflect what happened, what went wrong, what went right, you'll never learn. You'll never learn anything. So, I really think that it's so important to take time for yourself to just be obsessed with yourself. Like, girl, why are you obsessed with that random dude that dumped you and he doesn't like deserve even your fingernail and your pinky? Why are you obsessing over him? Like, why? Let me tell you why. You're obsessing over him. Because you got
10:07 emotionally attached to the person. And it doesn't matter. Like, looks don't even matter. It's how the person makes you feel. And um so many times like the jerks, they are the ones that get the good girls that get that pull girls that are so far out of their reach because girls lower their standards. You cannot do that. And I learned it the hard way. It was uh super painful. He made me feel like I didn't deserve it. You know, him didn't deserve him, the relationship, and everything. Then I realized that he was not worth it. You know, he was the one that didn't deserve me. And when you go into that with this type of mindset, you're not afraid to lose people. People leave your life. If a guy dumps you, if a guy leaves your life, that's his
10:53 problem. Like he was the one that lost. You didn't lose because you're just radiating your energy and he'll never have it anymore. You know, he just lost it forever. And a good mind shift that I really loved thinking about when I was going through heartache was not that he's the best that I ever had. not that, but switch it up and say, "I was the best he'll ever have or will have." He's not getting anything better than me because I'm topnotch. When you go in with that type of confidence, you know how many amazing guys you can attract, you know, and of course the jerks will always be there. The guys who can't pull you will be there, but you get to decide if you actually let them pull you and
11:38 you know, get stuck with them. Another thing I learned is that let people do what they want. If they want to leave, let them. If they want to break up with you, let them. If they don't want to be friends with you anymore, then let them. You can't make people do what you want them to do. You can use manipulation, seduction, but imagine this. If you could physically and mentally make somebody stay in the relationship that you want them to stay in, like stay in the relationship with you, love you, all of that. That wouldn't be love, would it? That would be just prison. And who wants that kind of relationship? Don't you want the love that goes both ways genuinely? Of
12:24 course you do. So, you shouldn't care about whether that person left or not. If if they did, then it's meant to be like that. And that's okay. You know, it might be painful to acknowledge at first when they meant the world to you. And it took me quite a bit of time to get over the relationship. When you put so much heart and soul into it, who you've been thinking about every single night, it's so hard to get over them. And it feels like it's impossible, but it is possible. Trust me. With time, as time goes by, if you reflect on what happened, uh, right or wrong, if you genuinely switch your mindset with these little mindset shifts that I shared with you guys, if you truly are conscious
13:11 about how you think, then you are going to get over them. You are going to realize that you're worth so much more than they could ever give. And that is the truth. And the truth for you is only if you make it true. And that's the beauty of being you. You get to decide what you believe in, what you think is true. And if they made you feel not enough, that's their problem. That's not your problem. I just wanted to remind you of that. You don't have to take responsibility for their mistakes, for why they did what they did. But it is best to take responsibility for your mistakes. And I know I've made mistakes. I've made so many mistakes in the relationship I was in. As I said, it goes both ways. And you can't escape that cuz love is both ways. Otherwise,
13:58 it's not love. Also, another thing is you have to get rid of things that remind you of them. If you have a photos album on your photos app and every time you go in to your photos, you see that album, you see it pops up with conversations like from you guys texting or photos of you. There is such there is such a big huge temptation to go over to that album and start rereading those old texts. And you have to realize both of you are not the same people anymore. The guy that he used to be, the nice guy, that's not him anymore. And you can't change that fact. You know, if he left, then he left. And it is so tempting to go over and start looking at old things, old memories that remind you of the
14:45 relationship of him. But it's not going to help you get over him. I I promise you that. That's one thing I'm 100% sure about. You're not going to get over him by stalking his Instagram. You're not going to get over him by asking your friends to prank call him. You're not going to get over him if you keep asking your friends if anything new happened with him, you know, or if he's dating anyone. like you just have to kind of close the door. And if he never gave you closure, you can give it to yourself. You don't have to wait forever or be heartbroken forever or let that void just dig deeper and deeper into, I don't know, something dreadful. Like you can give yourself closure for sure. I know
15:30 that because it is possible. I've done that. And it's by journaling. It's by reflecting. It's by listening to podcasts, you know, it's by redirecting your goals and shifting the focus from them to yourself because if you're anything like me, then you definitely did put them on a pedestal, you know, above everything else, you know, even above yourself. And that's not healthy. Like that's not okay. You should not do that. It's super bad for your mental health. And I can testify about that. You should never put someone on a pedestal because first of all, you're lying to yourself. like they are not what you say they are. You are giving this person so much more credit than they deserve and you start to believe that and that's how you get more emotionally attached to them. So clearly
16:16 setting boundaries, respecting each other in the relationship is so important. When there's lack of respect, there's forks flying around. And when there's forks flying around, that's when problems happen. People just break apart. Oh my gosh, I'm sweating in this car. The car is not on and there's like no AC and like I literally have sweat all over me. Oh my gosh. I was talking about this topic so passionately that I didn't even realize I'm all covered in sweat and I'm like so hot. Oh my gosh, look at that. Can you see the shine? I don't know if you can, but I really want to jump into like a really cold pool right now with a bunch of ice. Um, maybe one day or just like swim in the ocean because the ocean's pretty nice and refreshing. Anyways, off topic.
17:04 But you guys, this was the video. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you related to it. And if you did, then comment down below. I'd love to know what you guys are going through. And um, if you have anything specific you want me to film a video for you guys, you know, or do a podcast session like this, then let me know in the comments below. I'd love to do that for you guys. And finally, if you did relate to this video, then I'm sure you will relate to my new song, upcoming debuted single, Advice. It's out August 15th, Friday. Um, and I'm super super super excited to share it with you all and with the world. Just releasing the song and I hope it'll soar, fly high into the sky, and touch people's hearts because
17:49 it is so relatable. No, I wrote it when I was going through heartache and I kind of relate and resonate with it so much. It is such a special song to me and I hope you guys like it. Like, share, and subscribe. I love you guys so much and I'll see you in my next videos. Bye.
