The Real Spiritual Indicator | Being Ordinary

0:01 If you've begun sensing that beneath all your seeking lies something you've always known. And you've perhaps read so many books and followed teachers and tried meditation or practices but feel there's something deeper that is calling you then what I'm about to share may offer a moment of understanding. In my years of walking this path and witnessing others return to the depth of

0:46 stillness, I've noticed certain patterns that seem to unfold naturally. And the body and mind, energy and consciousness appear to move through different ways of being as they return to their original fluidity. Even in deep presence, life moves through us. And the difference lies in whether experiences dissolve like morning mist or they accumulate like stones in still water. Most who begin this journey don't

1:34 realize what they're truly undertaking. They assume it's about finding peace, you know, or achieving enlightenment or becoming a better version of themselves. But what I've witnessed is something different. And that is a gradual return to what you've always been before. Conditioning obscured your essential nature. And this return to stillness doesn't happen all at once. Consciousness has gathered layers of conditioning over years or decades.

2:19 And while moments of dissolution can be immediate, the integration of each release create space for deeper patterns to surface and be embraced. And from what I've observed, this creates a natural movement through different phases, each characterized by shifts in how the body holds its stories and how the mind dances with experience and how consciousness relates to the endless flowing of daily life. What I'm sharing here is simply what I've witnessed within myself and within my students. And they're loose observations that may

3:05 offer some understanding rather than rules that you should follow. And none of this makes you better or worse, more advanced or less awakened. And these observations ultimately mean nothing except perhaps of recognition that you're not alone in what you're experiencing. And also what I'm sharing here is not a tick and flick list or an achievement letter which I see so many people doing on this pathway. And these observations cannot be rushed or skipped or checked off like spiritual

3:52 accomplishments. And they represent organic shifts that happen through grace, through the patient dissolution of what was never real. And the mind will want to use these observations to measure and compare to figure out which phase it's achieved. But that very impulse keeps you trapped in the seeking that ultimately dissolves. And what I've witnessed again and again is that having these loose understandings can help you navigate with some discernment rather than wandering blindly for years

4:39 or even decades. You may recognize the spiritual marketplaces false promises, avoid getting trapped in dead ends, and understand that the real journey is about dissolution rather than spiritual accumulation. I've also noticed that genuine transformation requires work that addresses not just the mind or emotions but the physical and the energetic and consciousness layers simultaneously. partial approaches working only on thoughts or only on

5:26 feelings or only through meditation create what I see as instability that allows spiritual ego to flourish. Ultimately, none of this makes you better or worse than anyone else. You are not more advanced if you recognize yourself in later observations, not less awakened if you find yourself in earlier ones. These are simply moments of understanding, fleeting recognitions that you're not alone in what you're experiencing as you return to what has always been whole within you. And let's move to we can call it stage

6:13 one. And you're held in reactivity. And the body carries tension like armor. It's reactive and constantly alert. Life feels like surviving rather than truly living. And there is little space between what happens and how you respond. And in this first stage, consciousness moves almost entirely through reactive patterns that are woven from accumulated life experiences. And the body exists in chronic activation, muscles held in protective tensions that have become so familiar they feel like

6:58 home. And the nervous system remains perpetually vigilant, scanning the horizon for threats and interpreting even gentle experiences through the lens of old wounds and disappointments. And life feels like a series of challenges that need to be survived rather than gifts to be received. And emotional responses arise automatically and intensely. And they're triggered by environmental whispers that activate old patterns without conscious awareness of the invisible connection between trigger and response.

7:46 You know, there's a a particular tone of voice or an energetic frequency or a familiar situation instantly creates anxiety, anger or withdrawal. But you attribute these reactions to stress, your personality or circumstances rather than recognizing them as the awakening patterns that sleep within. And the mind runs constant commentary on experience, comparing present moments to past events, projecting future scenarios based on old stories, generating elaborate strategies for avoiding or

8:31 controlling what might come. And this mental hyperactivity is not true thinking but rather the automatic broadcasting of activated memories through the mental layer and also the energetics. And it's like an old radio stuck between stations and it's crackling with interference. And in this stage, sleep offers little sanctuary because the same reactive patterns continue their restless dance during rest. And your dreams often feel agitated and exhausting, replaying variations of the same conflicts and anxieties that dominate

9:19 your waking consciousness. And then you wake feeling depleted rather than renewed. and you're already bracing for the challenges and stresses that await. And relationships feel difficult and unpredictable because interactions constantly trigger patterns that generate reactions unrelated to the actual souls or situations before you. And intimacy can feel dangerous because emotional openness increases the likelihood of activation. And social situations require a tremendous energy to navigate because

10:05 maintaining appropriate responses demands constant effort to suppress or manage reactive impulses that arise like sudden storms. And you may seek relief through various forms of numbing and distraction or stimulation. Whether it's substances or entertainment and compulsive activities or even spiritual practices used as escape from the intensity within. But these provide only temporary restbite because the underlying patterns remain active. they're ready to reassert their influence as soon as the numbing

10:51 effects fade. And then we can go to stage two, which we could call moments of relief. And in this stage, the body learns to soften, though it returns to familiar holding patterns and there are glimpses of spaciousness, but they fade under pressure. And so many people believe the journey ends here when they start tasting this. And as healing begins to touch some of the surface patterns, you experience your first taste of what consciousness feels like without constant interference. And these glimpses come unexpectedly.

11:40 And there are moments when the body spontaneously releases chronic tension, when the mind becomes generally quiet, when emotional reactivity subsides and a sense of spaciousness emerges. And during these moments, you recognize something perhaps that you've never experienced before. that the natural ease and peace that characterize consciousness in its unobstructed state. And colors appear more vivid and sounds become clearer. And there is a quality of presence that makes ordinary activities feel really fresh and alive.

12:26 And the body feels lighter, more fluid, and more responsive. and the breath flows naturally without effort or attention and that it feels like mental clarity emerges without the usual struggle to focus or concentrate. But these moments are often temporary visitors. And when external pressures arise or familiar triggers are encountered, the undesolved patterns reassert their authority and consciousness returns to its habitual reactive state. And in this stage, you learn that relaxation and spaciousness are

13:12 possible, but discover that maintaining these states requires favorable conditions. and the absence of strong activations. And this stage can be particularly challenging because the contrast between glimpses of natural ease and the return to reactive patterns becomes stark and sometimes really painful because you now know what you are missing during periods of activation. And this can create frustration with the inconsistency of experience and longing for the peaceful states that

13:58 seem to come and go. The mind's first deception often begins here. And many mistake these initial improvements for the completion of their healing or spiritual journey. The relief from chronic reactivity feels so significant that they assume they have addressed their fundamental nature. They may discontinue therapeutic work or reduce spiritual practice or consider themselves essentially awakened because the worst symptoms have subsided. However, this stage represents only the beginning

14:45 of the return process. The deeper patterns that create the substrate for reactive consciousness have not yet even been touched. And while you have more space and experience more moments of ease, the fundamental structure that generates reactivity remains largely intact and it's ready to be activated by more intense triggers or prolonged stress. And so let's move on to stage three, which we could call deeper letting go.

15:30 And here the body begins to release what it has been storing for lifetimes. The mind becomes more spacious. Lightness emerges though external pressure still creates ripples. So as the healing continues working through progressively deeper layers of accumulated patterns, the body begins releasing tensions that have been held for years or even decades. And this release often occurs in waves with periods of spontaneous emotional expression, physical discharge or energetic movement of old patterns dissolve and their stored content is

16:15 freed. The breath then deepens naturally, accessing regions of the body that have been constricted for so long that their opening feels like a revelation. And chronic pain patterns often begin shifting or disappearing entirely as the experiences that created muscular holding are dissolved at their source. And sleep becomes more restorative as the nervous system learns to genuinely rest rather than maintaining vigilant alertness even in your dreams. And mental spaciousness becomes more

17:01 consistent with periods of natural quiet that do not require meditation or conscious effort to achieve. And the compulsive quality of thinking begins to subside and it's replaced by mental activity that serves actual purposes rather than simply broadcasting the content of activated patterns. And so you then discover you can engage mental activity when needed and allow it to rest when it is not needed rather than experiencing thinking as an involuntary process beyond your influence.

17:46 And you'll find that emotional responses become more appropriate to actual circumstances rather than being amplified by old patterns that connect present situations to the accumulated past. So, while emotions still arise, they feel more clean and direct and they're related to what is actually happening rather than colored by layers of historical reactivity. And so you begin to experience emotions as natural responses that arise and pass like the weather without creating lasting disturbances in the

18:32 sky of awareness. But here the mind creates its second major illusion. The increased peace and emotional stability can convince you that you've reached enlightenment or deep awakening. You may start teaching others or positioning yourself as someone who has arrived. However, intense external pressures or particularly strong triggers can still activate remaining patterns temporarily return consciousness to reactive states. The key recognition is that these activations,

19:18 while less frequent, still feel overwhelming when they occur. If challenging situations still create lasting disturbance that takes time to process or release, if you find yourself strategizing to avoid certain triggers, if you still carry emotional charge from difficult interactions, you are solidly in this stage regardless of the peace you feel in calm moments and relationships begin feeling far more natural and effortless. As you become less reactive to others emotions and behaviors, you discover you can remain present and

20:05 responsive during interactions that would have previously triggered withdrawal or defensive reactions. However, you may still find yourself becoming activated in particularly charged interpersonal situations or when engaging with those who carry intense energetic fields. It's like stepping too close to a fire that still burns hot. And so then we move on to stage four which can be the hidden layers of dissolving. And in this stage the connection between body, mind and field deepens.

20:50 What once stuck now moves through more freely and stability begins to emerge that external pressure cannot shake. And at this stage the healing has dissolved enough surface and intermediate patterns that deeper more fundamental conditioning begin surfacing to be addressed. And these are often patterns formed during the tender years of maybe your life or that carry particularly intense energetic charges from significant life events. And as these deeper layers dissolve, you experience a qualitative shift in your relationship to all experience

21:38 and the integration between the physical, mental, emotional and energetic layers becomes more seamless. Information flows naturally between these different aspects of your reality and of consciousness without the barriers and disruptions that previously created internal conflict and confusion. And you experience yourself as more unified, more coherent, more naturally integrated than ever before. And external pressures that would have previously created significant activation now pass through consciousness with minimal impact. And

22:25 you discover you can navigate challenging situations and difficult conversations or stressful environments while maintaining your essential stability and clarity. And this isn't because you have learned coping strategies or developed better emotional regulation skills, but because the patterns that would have created reactivity in these situations no longer exist. However, the mind's third deception emerges here, and it's often the most convincing one yet.

23:11 The dramatic increase in stability and the ability to remain calm in previously triggering situations can create a profound sense of spiritual accomplishment. And you may begin to see yourself as enlightened or awakened, perhaps even superior to those still struggling with reactivity. And the reality check is this. If you still feel proud of your equinimity, if you find yourself comparing your peace to others reactivity, if you're aware of maintaining your centeredness or feel you've achieved

23:58 something special, you're experiencing a beautiful and necessary stage, but not true stillness. Real stillness doesn't know itself as still. It doesn't compare itself to disturbance and it doesn't feel accomplished about its peace. The mind operates with increasing clarity and efficiency in this stage. Focusing naturally on what is relevant and releasing what is not without conscious effort to direct attention. And mental energy that was previously consumed by repetitive thinking patterns becomes available for creative

24:45 engagement with actual life circumstances. And your decision making becomes clearer and more intuitive as you learn to distinguish between responses that arise from wisdom and reactions that arise from remaining patterns. And physical vitality increases significantly as energy bound up in holding patterns then becomes available for life functions. And then you may notice you require less sleep or you have more consistent energy throughout the day and you feel more resilient to physical stress and exercise and physical activity

25:31 becomes more enjoyable and less of an effort as the body moves with increasing freedom and natural coordination. Spiritual or transcendent experiences may arise spontaneously as consciousness gains access to layers that were previously really obscured by accumulated interference. However, these experiences feel natural and integrated rather than dramatic or disorientating. And you do not become attached to special states or experiences, but you recognize them as simply another aspect

26:17 of consciousness returning to its natural range of functioning. We move to stage five, which we could call the natural flow. And the body and mind no longer hold what passes through them. The system adjusts naturally without conscious effort. And what once created strain now passes through without leaving traces. And in this fifth stage, consciousness has achieved a state of natural flow where experiences arise and pass without creating lasting impressions or accumulated as new patterns.

27:02 And the body has learned to remain naturally relaxed or more relaxed and responsive regardless of external circumstances. And the mind operates with clear efficiency. And it engages when mental activity is needed and resting when it is not and without the constant background shatter that characterized earlier stages. And most significantly, you discover that you no longer accumulate new reactive patterns in response to challenging experiences. And so difficult situations, emotional interactions, or stressful environments

27:49 create appropriate responses in the moment, but do not leave energetic residues that continue influencing consciousness after the experience has passed. And then this represents a fundamental shift in how consciousness relates to experience. So from accumulating and storing impressions to allowing experiences to pass through awareness like light passing through clear water. And you can engage fully with whatever life presents without concern about whether experiences will create lasting disturbance or activation.

28:37 And you discover you can have difficult conversations and you can deal with crisis situations or navigate complex challenges while maintaining your essential equilibrium. And the fear of emotional overwhelm or energetic depletion that may have caused you to avoid certain situations or relationships no longer operates as intensely because you know that even intense experiences can pass through your system often still with help that's needed from yourself without creating lasting impact. But here lies the mind's fourth and

29:22 perhaps most subtle deception. The profound sense of flow and nonaccumulation can create what feels like the ultimate spiritual achievement. And you may feel you have transcended human conditioning entirely and reached a state of permanent enlightenment. Now, the honest assessment is this. If you're aware of the flow, if you notice that experiences aren't sticking, if you feel accomplished about not accumulating patterns, you're in a beautiful state of healing, but not yet in true stillness.

30:08 If you find yourself explaining to others how nothing affects you anymore, if you feel you've transcended ordinary human experience, if there is any sense any sense of specialness about you and your state, the mind is creating a very sophisticated spiritual identity. And additionally to this, if intense life crises, death of a loved one or health issues or an accident or profound betrayals still have the capacity to destabilize you for extended periods, you have not yet reached the natural flow of stage 5.

30:53 True non-accumulation means even the most challenging human experiences will move through like I said often still with help from yourself with your practices without leaving lasting residue and relationships become increasingly natural and spontaneous as you no longer need to manage reactions or protect yourself from others emot emotional states and you can be present with others pain, anger or confusion without becoming activated or feeling compelled to fix or change anything. And then this creates for genuine

31:40 intimacy and authentic communication that was not possible when consciousness was constantly defending against potential triggers. And your work and daily activities become expressions of natural engagement rather than sources of stress or drain. And you discover you can apply yourself fully to tasks and responsibilities without the effort feeling depleting and burdenome. And you naturally prioritize what is important and release what is not. And you can make decisions from clarity rather than from reaction to external pressures or internal compulsions.

32:28 And then sleep becomes genuinely restorative as the nervous system no longer carries the energetic charge of the day's experiences into rest. And your dreams may become more clear and purposeful and sometimes providing insight or guidance, but they no longer replay the emotional content of unresolved experiences because experiences are resolving naturally as they occur. And so then we move to stage six where stillness becomes a foundation and presence here is more constant and

33:15 it's unwavering regardless of circumstances. What enters from daily life releases without accumulation. And at this stage, stillness becomes the foundational quality of consciousness rather than something that emerges occasionally during peaceful moments or from practices. And this stillness is not the absence of activity or experience, but rather the unchanging background of awareness within which all activity and experience can occur. And you recognize the stillness as your

34:00 essential nature rather than as a state to be achieved or to maintain or to witness. And this foundational stillness remains constant regardless of external circumstances and intense situations, challenging interactions or demanding responsibilities all occur within the same unchanging field of deep awareness. And you experience yourself as fundamentally stable and unshakable. And it's not because you have developed greater resilience or coping abilities or you have numbed yourself or

34:47 you have shut down or you have tried to control the mind but because your essential nature of who you are is no longer obscured by reactive patterns and the release of experiences becomes quite natural that often you rarely notice it actually happening. And difficulties arise and they dissolve without leaving an energetic residue. And emotional responses occur appropriately to circumstances and then dissolve naturally without conscious effort to process or release them. And then mental engagement happens

35:33 efficiently and then gives way to natural quiet without effort to stop thinking or achieve mental silence again. And here the mind creates its most convincing final illusion before true stillness. The profound stability and automatic release of experiences can create a sense of having reached the ultimate state. And you may feel you have achieve permanent enlightenment and begin teaching or positioning yourself as fully awakened. And the reality check here is really stark. If you're aware that stillness is your

36:19 foundation, if you notice the automatic release happening or you've controlled it because you can also teach your mind to try and do that. If you feel you've achieved this stable state, the mind is creating perhaps its most sophisticated spiritual identity. And true foundational stillness doesn't observe itself being still. It doesn't notice automatic release because there's no separate observer to notice. There's no sense of achievement or attainment. And more specifically, if you still have a meditation practice

37:06 or any other practice to maintain your state, if you still choose environments or limit activities to preserve your peace, if you still feel the need to protect your energy or avoid certain people or situations. If you still talk about your spiritual state or you have all the words or feel others should recognize your realization, you're in a beautiful and profound healing stage. But you're not yet in true foundational stillness. And this stage brings a profound ordinariness to experience. And you do not feel special. You do not feel enlightened or different from

37:53 others, but rather you experience yourself as totally, utterly human, completely and utterly boring. And you're functioning as consciousness was designed to function before it became burdened with accumulated interference. And there is nothing dramatic or mystical about this state. It simply feels like the most natural way to be. And you also become increasingly invisible in social situations. And it's not because you withdraw from

38:38 an interaction, but because you no longer carry the energetic charge that creates friction or drama in relationships. And others often feel unusually peaceful and relaxed in your presence, though neither party may consciously recognize why. And this is very different to someone being regulated and co-regulating with someone. It's very very different. And also conversations become more direct and authentic as you respond to what is actually being communicated rather than reacting to projections or interpretations that have filtered through old patterns.

39:27 And your creative expression and natural talents may emerge or flourish as energy that was previously bound in maintaining reactive patterns and they become available for authentic self-expression. However, these changes and developments, they feel natural and effortless rather than achievements or accomplishments. And you engage your gifts and abilities without attachment to outcomes or need for recognition. And then we can come to stage seven, which we could call the complete return.

40:14 And again, I'm just laying these out as mere guidance. It's far more complex than this. So stillness in this stage is the natural state and it requires no effort to maintain and what arises releases pretty much immediately without conscious intervention. And even in complete presence, modern life continues to offer input and very little remains. The body still absorbs information and stimuli in every moment, but it doesn't stay with you. And the seventh stage represents the complete return to consciousness

41:03 original state. Stillness is not something you experience but something you are. And there is no separation between the experiencer and the quality of stillness. Awareness recognizes itself as naturally still, naturally peaceful, naturally whole without any sense of having achieved or attained this state. and you have returned home to what you never actually left. And experiences continue to arise as part of engaging with daily life, but they release

41:48 immediately and automatically without any conscious intervention or process. You do not have to work to let go of experiences or bring presence to them or be the observer because the natural functioning of consciousness in this state does not hold on to anything. Experiences move through you without leaving any traces or residue. So, in a sense, they're perfectly received and they're perfectly released. And modern life continues to present its full range of inputs literally in every single moment. You know, there

42:35 frequencies, there's social interaction, there's work demands, there's your bills to pay, family dynamics, but none of these create lasting impressions or they accumulate as new patterns. So you can live fully engaged with contemporary life while remaining unaffected by its potentially disturbing influences. And so for this stage it's almost impossible for the mind to claim falsely because there is no mind left to claim anything and there is no sense of being in a

43:21 state no awareness of spiritual achievement. There's no identity as awakened or enlightened or the observer. There is simply natural function and it's like breathing or heartbeat. It's completely effortless and unconscious of itself. And the markers of this stage are unmistakable. And there is no meditation practice because there is nothing to maintain. And there's no spiritual identity because there's no sense of being spiritual. And there's no teaching about

44:07 consciousness because there's no separate perspective from which to teach. And there's no protection of energy because there's no energy that can be disturbed. No avoidance of people or situations because nothing can create lasting impact and no discussion of awakening because there's no concept of ever having been asleep. But this stage is not withdrawal from the world or avoidance of challenging experiences. The thing is you remain fully present and responsive to whatever life presents. And often you're more engaged and effective than ever before because

44:56 your responses arise from clarity rather than from reactive patterns. And you can deal with crisis situations and navigate complex relationships and handle demanding responsibilities while maintaining perfect inner equilibrium. And you no longer think about consciousness, awareness, the observer, enlightenment, awakening, or your inner state because these have become as natural and invisible as breathing. You do not monitor reactions, practice letting go, or work to maintain peace because peace has become your natural condition. And

45:42 you do not seek experiences or avoid them because all experiences are equally welcome and equally temporary. And there's often a quality of profound simpleness or being so ordinary to the stage. That can be surprising to those who expect, you know, enlightenment or awakening to be dramatic or otherworldly. And you simply live naturally, responding appropriately to circumstances and engaging authentically and gently with others and participating fully in life

46:29 without any sense of effort or struggle. And you have returned to what consciousness was always meant to be before it became so complicated with accumulated interference. And it's meant to be simple and it's meant to be natural and it's meant to be gentle and it's meant to be boring and it's meant to be whole. And what I've witnessed is that these patterns unfold and disappear in a natural way as you do the work. But having some loose understanding hopefully from this episode can help you navigate with wisdom rather than stumbling through

47:17 years, months, decades of confusion. And while the return happens through grace rather than force, recognizing what you might encounter can hopefully save you from countless detours and dead ends that trap so many sincere and wonderful seekers. And what I've observed isn't linear. You know, elements of different phases may appear temporarily during earlier times and different aspects of life may seem to be operating at different levels simultaneously. And this is because dissolution happens at the level of specific patterns rather

48:04 than consciousness as a whole. And different areas of life may be governed by different collections and patterns that dissolve at their own perfect pace. And most importantly, I've noticed the mind's tendency to claim advanced realization prematurely. And each phase has its own form of spiritual seduction that can keep you trapped for years if you don't recognize it. And it's about being honest about what you're actually experiencing and understanding what genuine transformation looks like. And it serves your return to stillness

48:51 far better than wishful thinking or some sort of spiritual fantasy. And for those just beginning to sense the call towards something deeper, these observations hopefully offer some discernment. And you may recognize the spiritual marketplaces. you know, maybe false promises or maybe you'll be able to avoid teachers who keep students trapped in early phases and understand that the real journey is about dissolution rather than spiritual accumulation. And I want to reiterate that none of this is about perfection or achievement.

49:36 This is simply what I've witnessed as people return to what has always been natural. and allowing what was never theirs to dissolve until only what is true remains. Thank you for being with me and many blessings.